Posts Tagged ‘Lifestyle’

As he started enticing her, she reminded herself for the last time…  ‘Please don’t think of him’ 

it_hurts_so_bad_by_singsang

She had been married to Rajat for 6 months now. Arranged setup as it was, he was a perfect partner she could get. Quite a handsome piece created by lord, he was rich with perfect blend of brainy genes too. She had liked him at the first hour of their meeting itself.  

It had taken only 2 days for them to decide that they would want to spend their life with each other. He had adored her charm and wittiness, while she had fallen for his mannerism.

He started kissing her neck and she started pretending to be aroused. He unbuttoned himself in haste, and she guided him amidst the complexity of her clothes. At the end, she complimented the act and felt sad within. It had become usual of her.

Their marriage had been a simpler affair, the way she had planned always. With total gathering of 50 close family and friends, both were pronounced husband and wife in the picturesque beauty of Udaipur. Their honeymoon was no less than a fairy tale. Meticulously planned by Rajat, she has had joyful 20 days of her life.

She laid in the bed with broken heart, staring blankly at the ceiling. She could hear her own heartbeat, drumming loudly at the onset of something bad. She could imagine the situation she might face, leaving her married life in shatter. She could calculate the risk she had planned to take, where chances of failure were rather high. But she knew, it had to be done – not for him but for her.

She had skipped her cycle post first month of the marriage itself. She was embarrassed to share it with Rajat. She had waited for another month to be sure. Every pregnancy test had confirmed her about her fear. It was not what she had planned for next 3 years of her marriage. Finally she had decided to take medical help to get rid of the problem.

She dressed herself post the shower. Rajat seemed already asleep. He looked innocent and attractive. She kissed his forehead and decided to leave.

Life had made her meet him yet again, her first love at the doctor’s clinic. All this while, she had never missed him. She had been happy without him. But that day, at the table, he had squeezed her hand rather tightly to help her bear the pain. That day, he had spent whole day with her, caressing her tresses with his fingers while she slept. He was still unmarried. And he still cared for her.

She had decided to live with him for next few days, till the time she recovers. She did not want Rajat to know about her abortion.

She had missed the times she had spent with him, while he had cooked her all her favorites. She had missed the touch of him, while he had ensured her timely medicines and proper rest.

5 days with him at his place had made her realized, how much she still loved him.

She took a deep breath before ringing the doorbell. She reconfirmed within self, yes- this is what I want to do now.

2 months of perfect marriage seemed useless to her. The charm she once had for Rajat, looked fake now. She started hating him close. She started hating her situation. And she started hating her practicality.

She would sometimes evaluate her decision of leaving her love. She would sometimes criticize her decision of choosing Rajat. And she would sometimes compare the both, to come to a conclusion.

She rang the bell again. The door clicked. He looked perplexed to see her, at the odd hour of the night.

She knew it was the time.

She had spent months telling herself, the reasons for which she had left the love of her life. She had not liked the outlook he had for the life. She often had disliked his head over heel love for her. And she had not imagined him to be a good for husband kind of a guy.

But after multiple failed attempts to control self, she had finally decided otherwise.

“Please don’t think of him, I reminded myself yet again…While I had another night with my husband… Oh The fake love should now not kill me”

Epilogue –He had requested her to go back, to her perfectly smooth married life. But she has insisted on spending night with him. She had forced herself inside, only to find his girl friend. She had been shocked; it was not what she had expected. He had finally told her to leave, in rather rude tone this time.

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And then I realized, experiments are the best way to learn and have fun!

Being a market researcher, it is very irritating to see people envying you because of your frequent (read weekly) travel. The pain behind these travels are unknown to them, we fly early morning and return the same day under the darkest shade of night. If we are lucky, then we get to stay in lavish hotel rooms just to admire the antiques in the dreams and catch next day air traveler.

Alas! These travels make me feel tired and often, repellent towards the word ‘travel’!

I feel the same most of the times, but other times, I am just normal human being – who dreams to travel leisurely savoring nature and talking to birds (fancy dreams you know)

Last month, after travelling to 5 cities in 15 days around the country, I was bogged up to the core. I wanted to run away, from the world and from my own self. I wanted to have a good break, where I get sleep without being disturbed by untimely phone calls.

With the basics in mind clear, I searched for all ‘high altitude places’ (Because phone networks don’t work there- HURRAY!). But I knew, even though I would settle down for any place, my companions would have their own choices and timelines. I did not want to undergo adjustments – Remember, I was already exasperated.

I decided to enroll for a women only travel group – a chance to explore new people (which I do quite often but because of work) and get ‘away’ with management skills needed to convince friends.

The first ad that day on Facebook while still figuring out my trip ideas was of JUGNI – offering a weekend getaway to PARASHAR LAKE.

This is what Parashar Lake looks like  :)

This is what Parashar Lake looks like 🙂

Jugni is women only travel group run by two young minds Nitesh and Rohit. Started recently, the Jugnoos (that’s what they call themselves) have brilliant innovative ideas to keep girls engaged and offer them enticing trips.

For me, the idea of having a weekend with new people (and in budget) was a good deal – and a calculated risk also I think.

I had my apprehensions, think excitement of what would it be like travelling with entirely new clan.

We were supposed to meet on Friday night at the bus stop. When I reached, first girl I met made me confident of my decision. She was travelling alone (too), had reasons like me (too) and was ‘nice’ (like me too). I met others also, some first time solo-travellers, others travelling second time with Jugni and rest with friends. In all we were good group of 15 people, from different background! (The trip surely was proving a jackpot)

Next two days were among the best days of my life, and I am sure, for other Jugnis (that’s what we call ourselves now) too.

From sustaining to learning to loving to meeting- the trip had it all. We hopped through rocks to climb to no man’s land, just to realize that map was read all wrong.

The love bites from leeches to unwashed dirty peaches, the trek within the clouds holding hands to the joy of reaching the lake finally (after the labyrinth), from cocooning self in sleeping bags to hearing loud roars of clouds above us, from warming around the bonfire to singing melodiously (I doubt this melodious word here) with other travelers around, we did it all.

The trip proved a gift in disguise, letting me explore myself in better way. It also enabled me to get out of my shell and become confident of travelling and enjoying alone. Even though I had wonderful people around, I did get time to relish my own company.

After 2 days of ‘unexpected’ fun and humor, I was not very sure of ending the trip. We did bid goodbyes to each other, but only to promise to meet soon.

The rajma chawal as the meal to the tasteless omelettes, the Mandi secret to the bus adventure, the Babloo stories to truck ride back home, and the endless clicks to personal gigs- I miss it all.

Some snapshots from the memory lane

Some snapshots from the memory lane

Special Thanks to team Jugni, who made this trip memorable with their humour and glamour.

Thanks Rohit for being a help when I was shit tired to carry my bag pack to the top, for being a ‘PAHADO K DEVTA’ to run among mountains like a pro and for being sensible and caring organizer.

Thanks to the handsome boy Nitesh too, who kept us gripped with his endless jokes and scripts, who made sure to do his after sales ‘just right’ and who also ensured we all get our share of fun ‘wherever’.

With more love, looking forward to join you guys again for wonderful travel stories!

P.S: Girls, you can join them on Facebook here

Published in Ranchi Lifestyle, May 2015

It always has been a controversial topic- ‘women and their wants’. Most of the people (99.9% males) feel that women are the most complex species ever lived on the earth. But does that imply the other (better) halves are simpler?

While every man is different, there are few ‘aspirations’ every man wants to achieve.

We at Ranchi Lifestyle thought to decode and do a dissection of our Indian Man and see, what exactly holds too much importance in their lives.

<Girls, watch out… It is time for you to start thinking about them too)

  • A playful woman and an independent life partner

Want something that can drive him crazy and can attract him for a deeper connection. Men love to be active and to play. It is not what you say that makes them ‘feel for you’ but the overall experience you create for them. So little teasing and sarcasm here and there can always ramp up there interest.

Also, they like to have a woman who can inspire them in life – a woman with a purpose and not living only for relationship. Best way is to be busy in your own life and not making him ‘world’ suddenly. He never wants you to drop your interests, hobbies, work and fun for him- REMEMBER, he chose you for what you are and not for what he can mould you into!

  • A prideful body

This is one of the most important aspects of ‘I want’ list of any man. The passion to have a good looking body is seen to be strong in men primarily because it helps them score better!

Well, apart from the obvious reasons, a strong and nice build-up is seen to boost confidence and balance their emotional quotient.

  • Adventure and fun

Oh, this is their life. Adventure and fun keeps them going. Be it a cliff jumping or parasailing, they like it all. Obviously, extent of adventure does differ among individuals.

Fun on the other hand adds spice to their life. Men unlike women are too focussed on their definition of fun – a chilled beer with a buddy and checking out chicks is all they want.

  • Freedom and space

They value their relationships and their friends, but at the same time want that none should hamper their ‘ME TIME or PERSONAL SPACE’. They don’t like to give this licence to even their better halves. (Now you know why there are breakups!)

  • A simple discussion (and not arguments)

Men like to keep it simple and straightforward and expect the same from the person they interact with. They say what they feel without filtering (most of the times). They want to understand the opinions and the reason of mismatch, and don’t like when a simple discussion turns into an arguments. Ladies, they don’t really fear a lost battle, all they want is ‘a simple discussion’.

  • Gadgets

Notebook, music player, tablets and what not, you name it and they will like to have them all. Yes, they are crazily madly in love with gizmos. It makes them feel empowered.

The only thing that can stop them owning is the great wall of ‘affordability’!

  • A good quality drink – Primarily Beer and whiskey!

When know their drinks well, it is not for ‘getting drunk’. They savour the experience the liquid gives them and hence, they are in constant look out for good quality drinks. Beer and Whiskey are their hot favourites. While Beer is considered as a casual drink giving edge to their boyish age, Whiskey is for machoism and its taste as they ascend the life stage.

  • Emotional support

Yes, many men may not agree to this but men are really weak when it comes to emotions. However, they don’t like to show it. If they are emotionally attached with you, they will never harm or cheat you for sure (unless they are psychopaths). They always look for encouragement, appreciation and recognition among their known. A fair expectation, isn’t it?

So girls, do you now understand why man behave like the way they are?

And guys let us know if we missed out on something!

 

 

princessI had seen her calm, ALWAYS…

She stood straight out of bed, looking torn out. The room looked dark, with dried twigs and cramped feathers here and there. It has been quite a while since she last cleaned her room.

I remember meeting her one day. Calm, serene and elegantly seated, she looked like a princess. The emerald around her neck had caught my attention. Her skin glowed under the sun, showing her untouched beauty. God! she was beautiful. The beauty was incomparable.

She looked out of the window; the day was dull for her. She unwillingly walked towards the other room to get ready for the day, carelessly cleaning the floor with her torn out gown.

One day, I had told her that I am hungry. I had no money to buy food for myself. She had brought me the grandest meal of my life. I owe her. She had made me sleep on her lap, caressing my hair with her finger.

In fact, she had even gifted me clothes. The best of clothes, I knew. Soft, colorful and beautiful, those clothes were the best. She never had asked me to return favors.

She passed the mirror which was once her pride. The mirror showed her the outer world. She did not care to look at it. She knew, nothing was left to see.

Once, I had asked her about that mirror. She had taken me in front of it. I could see millions of people, rejoicing, celebrating and dancing. I had asked the reason. She had smiled and told me, they all are my people’. It was magical for me. She was care taker of millions like me. I don’t know, I think, I had started loving her more, possibly, respecting her more.

She sat on the broken chair. It seemed that her legs pained. With the blood stains on her face, she looked older.

There was a day when one among her people had thrown a stone at her. It had hit her right on the face. There was blood drops on the road, as she had walked towards her castle.

Some had criticized the act, but rest had related it with their right to the throne.

I remember her crying, but she loved her people. She never retorted.

She could hear the cry outside. She could hear people screaming for help. She could hear small kids looking for their lost parents. She could hear it all. But it did not matter to her any more.

She closed her eyes to let the last drop of tear fall.

I had seen her shattered that day. She was sitting on the rock, looking at the nothingness. I tried talking to her, but she had ignored me. It looked like her dignity had been targeted this time. It looked like she had lost the love she had. It looked like she was ready for the revenge.

She gathered herself together to have her next sleep. It was not the time, still she felt like taking a nap. She seemed tired.

It had been a long day for her. She had ordered for a mass slaughtering. It was hard for her to give such orders, but she knew, it was imperative to maintain the harmony.

She could not stand the ‘exploitation’ she had gone through over these years any longer, her people tearing her clothes publicly, humiliating her and often hurting her physically. It required taking an action.

She had initially tried to warn people with small punishments, but they did not stop.

I wanted to apologize to her, for the act we humans have done to her. But she did not hear yet again. I wanted to make her feel, that I understand. But I know, even my lifestyle has been a reason for her remorse.

She slept on the hardened bed of rocks, looking as innocent like a child. She knew, she would need to prepare herself to extend help next day, to the orphaned kids. She knew, being the mother that she is to them, she would need to feed hundreds of mouths tomorrow again, to whom the destruction had caused loss.  She knew, being the exploited nature that she is, she would still need to shelter them under her arms, who had once thrown stones at her.

I know, dear Mother Earth, you still are the loving princess of our lives.

I know dear Mother Earth; we still owe you day and night.

And I know, dear Mother Earth, these changes in the environment and frequent destructions are the results of what we have sown.

“And, I tried finding the calm and serene Nature yet again; she is alive and is still there… but lives in doom with anger and fear”

 

 

 

The day which is scheduled for 14th February every year, attracts many wanted and unwanted attention. While many of us get excited of knowing that it is coming, rest of the world feel depressed for the same reasons.

The excited ones- go out to buy the prettiest red dress, the sexiest red tie, hit Google for gifting options and do reservations, though the rest of the world, succumb themselves only to blame work for no outings.

Either ways, the day is worth the wait and fun to experience.

However, over the years, the day had been revamping itself. While it all started with expressing love and gifting roses and chocolates to the one you love, our gen-next has taken a step ahead to define the day.

The new generation is techie, impatient and often lazy – searching for something which saves time and energy. They are not too emotionally attached, and don’t mind shifting to next prospects. They take love with rather a pinch of salt. For them, the day is another excuse to ask for dates.

While the ‘no strings attached relationships’ mantra is becoming the ‘big thing’, there are many who still sail on the love seas. For them, the love day is everything they live for.

So to help both- the fast forward generation as well as the love birds to buy some nice gifts for the day, we have few smart options for the different type of lovers on the block à

  • If your love of the life is ‘tech-maniac’ – these people are majorly honours in technology. They breathe, live and eat only to know which gadget would be launched next. Their life revolves around singing goodnight jingles over phone for you and telling you about the hottest tech-pad they aspire. Well, these are the expensive of the lots. While their choice of gifts would range anything from I-pad to smart watches to X-boxes, we suggest you to look for customization within the limited choice you have in your budget. You can gift covers for their gadgets engraved with their names along with yours or you could get the back of the gadget printed with the picture of you together.
  • When you know your love is a ‘day-dreamer’ – if your lover is a day dreamer, trust you have hit a jackpot. They are sweet people, who would prefer to date you in their thoughts rather than forcing you to buy an expensive gift for the day. Their idea of love is to have you by their side and discuss their unlimited future plans. A smallest of a teddy bear over the candle light dinner makes them elated. For the male day-dreamers, we suggest a day well spent in your nicest of the dress to make you look cute and happy.
  • If the better half is too smart and creative – a tough one to handle, you rather need to plan ahead for the day to make them special. They know you in and out, plus the creativity zeal in them often depresses you about the gifts you should give. Take a deep breath and stop competing in their creativity. It will be hard to beat them. The simplest ideas could range from looking for something they had never done to may be an adventure sport option or planning a treasure hunt for the things they love.
  • Only if it’s your first valentine with her/him – a word of caution- don’t do Bolly-wood in front of them! They don’t want you to be romantic and go crazy booking tables at the most expensive restaurants, all they want is you right now. So discuss and plan the day together- girls would rather enjoy getting dressed in your favourite clothes while guys might love you for managing whole day for them.
  • Suggested for ‘love at first sight’ – these are like emergency situations, cupid has just thought to strike your chords. Don’t plan anything. Safest option is to stick to traditional flowers and chocolates in a heart shaped box!
  • If your love is already celebrating its silver jubilee– when you know that you both are born, lived and also ageing together. They rule your heart, mind and soul now, and you don’t remember the last time you dated someone else. Your love is complaining about the tasteless food and fighting over petty issues. The most romantic gift you can give them is the glimpse of memory lane. It could be as simple as gifting them an album of memories with short notes to as complicated as making a movie on your love life together.
  • Hooked and booked conditions – if you are still enjoying your courtship period with your love or are newly-wed couple, planning a mini-picnic or trip is not a bad idea. You could also gift diamonds and accessories to add oomph to the new love.
  • If you are single and ready to mingle – If the cupid has not aimed his arrow at you yet, but you are dying to get attacked soon – this is one for you. Buy something for yourself; you would have otherwise loved your partner to gift you. Use it the same day and spend the time of singlehood with yourself. Drink coffee and eat pastry, go on for a bike ride and wear the prettiest colour you like. Do things for yourself, this could be the last year to love and pamper yourself like you do at present. And you never know, the chirpy you on V-day is the only way to find your love

All we want to suggest you is that, no matter what you gift and what you do, just enjoy the ride to the unknown destination!

Keep calm ny resolution

 New Year’s is one of the most celebrated days for most of us in the year – giving us hopes and helping us get away from all the not-so-good things we did last year. It is like a re-incarnation for some, a video game for others where they have cleared another stage successfully.

We make plans, do night outs and go bunzy-jumping when the clock stuck 12 midnight. Yohoo, a new year. Every year, we do everything differently.

But what most remain consistent with most of us is –OUR NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

And after 365 days of trying to attain those goals (or rather pretend attending), we just scratch them off to jot down fresh goals… PHEWW…

 

Today being the second last day of this eventful year – 2014, I thought to pen down some cautions before you pledge again for the new year’s resolution and fail drastically yet again (like me) –

  • Don’t punish yourself – It starts with, ‘I will lose 20 pounds this year’ to ‘I will not date Samaira anymore’ – a list full of restrictions and DONT’S. Dude, this new years is not meant to murder you with its sharp knife, come on, this year means another chance to live your life. Utilize it, don’t kill it. Instead of “I will not…”… Write “I will…” like I will go sky diving this year, I will at least do 5 solitude travelling, I will learn guitar, I will date 5 different girls from different countries and things like that!

           I can already feel the motivation 🙂

  • Be innovative – your wish list should at least have one crazy thing to look back upon. What is the fun of doing only the obvious.

           Think Think Think- as crazy as you can 😉

  • Be real, you are not a superman  -even super heroes work one case at a time; don’t run into multiple things at the same time for the year. Be realistic of what you are writing, if you are serious about fulfilling your resolution this year. So may be, writing down that you will go to Mount Everest when you don’t have a basic training is saying too much, may be you can replace it with trekking with friends. Trust, it will be more fun and achievable.

          But don’t listen to me if you can really touch the highest peak 🙂

  • Have an action plan ready à it is not one day that you will decide, “O; I had to go para-gliding this year, let’s do it”. Complete No. Plan when will you do what. Distribute your ‘wish list’ among the 12 months of the year, so that none of them feel cheated and you are not burdened.

           I am freaking out in May I know, and may be relax and go leisure trip in October holidays

  • Keep ticking as you do – yes, you lazy ass…Write your resolutions first and then tick them off once you fulfil any one of them. So by the time you approach half the year, you don’t get lost and lose the track. This is necessary to keep you going throughout the year

           As motivated and encouraged in August as in January!

  • Keep calm, it is just another fun-wish list – At the end of the year, don’t scold yourself for not fulfilling few ideas you thought you would do. It is completely okay. Remember, at least your track record is not bad like the previous years. At least you tried doing stuffs you wanted.

          So enjoy what you did this year and will be doing next year!

 

Think enough of blah-blah before you immerse yourself in the new year blast and lose your senses 😉

Happy new year’s Folks, wish you a prosperous year ahead

With Love, MISHTEEY 

 

 

I sometimes feel lucky; I had been a daughter to wonderful parents.  They have stood by me when I had made blunders, they have shown me the beautiful side of the world and they have made me what I am today.

I feel safe, loved and confident. I know what I want and I know I am not alone. I can fight for myself and can help others. I have my own personality and dreams. I am ME.

Not everyone is as lucky, I reckon.

While our society knows what should be a daughter like, they ignore the fact that they need to guide them too.

Trust, raising a daughter is more than ‘giving candies’ and ‘loving’.  And at this present situation where you cannot even trust your own blood; your daughters need extra learning and care.

Here are few things, which I believe, every parent should tell their daughters in their growing up stages:

  • We are always there for you; do not shy away with your secrets: First and foremost, trust your girl and give her time to trust you. Remember, she would not share her concerns/worries if you are not ready to believe her already. After all, all she wants is to have her parents around, in good or bad.
  • You are not a thing, to be touched and felt anytime: You need to tell her, teach her, what a bad touch is and a good touch. Ask her to come to you whenever she is in pain. Do not order her these things, but discuss. Do not feel shy discussing things with her. It is important and useful for her. They need right guidance for the time when you are not around.
  • Confidence is your beauty: Many Parents appreciate their daughters on her beauty when they dress up nicely. This can harm their confidence in longer run. Educate them, beauty is not about looking good and wearing nice outfits, it is more about showcasing yourself as a confident individual. Face beauty may fade away with time, but confidence in you will always keep you shined.
  • Be yourself, decide for your life: Trust them, give them chances to experiment and tell them to decide on their own. Nothing beats learning through experiences. But yes, that does not mean you leave them alone. Do supervise what they are doing. Point them if you don’t agree, listen to their views and then decide together.
  • Keep emotions at bay when not needed: it is common for people to say, that girls are emotional fools. Well, there is nothing to be ashamed of your emotions. But one need to tell daughters that emotions are not meant to be wasted. Communicate, that emotions are not bad but need to be used wisely. Cite instances, talk and share your own instances with her.
  • Saying “NO” is not bad: this is the most important thing every girl needs to learn. Saying No is always better than doing something one is not comfortable in. If she lose her friends, let it be, if saying no makes her look stupid, let it be and if saying No keeps her away , let it be. She needs to learn that either she could be one among the herd and get slaughter at the end, or be a tiger to walk alone with pride.
  • You are more important than society: yes, we all are social animals. But don’t forget we have made this society. Instead of telling your daughter to do things due to societal norms, have confidence and open up with her. Her life is more important to you than people whom you don’t even know.
  • Being a girl is not bad: While your daughter might get exposed to ill effects of society, you need to build her confidence in her own gender. There might be 100 rapes happening around, one girl every day is being assaulted, or may be every second girl has her story of eve teasing, still being a girl is not your fault and it is not bad. Narrate her beauty of being a girl and tell her how she is important part of the eco system.

Dear Fathers, she is also watching how you are treating her mother; be an example of a Man your daughter would respect.

  • Be independent: you might think that this has nothing to do with your daughter’s safety or her life, yet I bet it is important. Feed her with the lesson, every girl needs to be independent. She might choose not to work, but she always should possess skills and confidence to feed herself and her kids when in need rather than doing things she would not want to do.
  • Your home is your rescue: No matter if she fails hundred times, she should have belief that her home is the safest place where she can come back. She would not be criticized for her failures, she would be appreciated for her little achievements and she would be protected from harms. It is every parent’s duty to make their daughter feel this way.

These are small things to be taken care of. And you cannot imagine yourself sitting one day and telling her all. Every day needs to be invested in her.

Daughters are very sensitive, they need to be loved and lived. That’s all!!!